Coming Soon (and by "coming" I mean "cumming"):

Shortbus
Grade: B-

How kinky is Shortbus, one of the most buzzed about films at this year’s Cannes Film Festival?
Let’s just say that connoisseurs of hardcore pornography may find themselves blushing on multiple occasions.
A straight couple graphically demonstrates an encyclopedic knowledge of the Kama Sutra. A female dominatrix whips a young man as he masturbates on a bed. A naked man contorts his body, gives himself oral pleasure, and then ejaculates in his mouth.
And that’s just the first five minutes.
Shortbus is the brainchild of John Cameron Mitchell, who directed and starred in the wonderful 2001 film adaptation of Hedwig and the Angry Inch. Here he forgoes acting and sticks to writing and directing duties.
In the tradition of Bernardo Bertolucci’s Last Tango in Paris, Mitchell boldly challenges taboos and opens up a new world of sexual possibilities for viewers. He’s not judgmental of his characters, regardless of their sexual orientation or their preference for monogamy, three-ways or full-on orgies. If there’s a bottom line, it’s that he really wants everyone to get their rocks off.
Mitchell proves that he’s a sexual pioneer, but unfortunately the rest of Shortbus rides on flat tires. Most of the characters are self-absorbed in a dull way, and much of the dialogue is wooden. For a movie that traffics in orgasms and erections, it’s baffling how unstimulating and anticlimactic the whole viewing experience feels.
Set in post 9/11 New York City, the film focuses on a group of people who converge at an underground sex club called Shortbus. Because the gay overseer sees his patrons as “gifted and challenged,” he named the establishment after the compact buses that transport handicapped and mentally retarded children.
We meet a gay couple named James and Jamie, their three-way buddy Ceth and a bisexual dominatrix named Severin. Sook-Yin Lee delivers the most nuanced performance as Sofia, a sex therapist who has never had an orgasm.
Shortbus starts off as a light comedy and goes off the deep end of melodrama by the end. The changes in tone feel arbitrary, as though Mitchell doesn’t really know what to do with the plot when he’s not using it as a playground for sexual experimentation. As a result, this bus feels like it’s riding on fumes by the time it reaches its destination.