ALL WET

Here's yet another dud from the 2006 summer movie season, opening in theaters this Friday:

Lady in the Water
Grade: C

M. Night Shyamalan follows up his critical flop The Village with a convoluted fairy tale about a Philadelphia apartment manager (Paul Giamatti) who tries to protect a visiting sea nymph (Bryce Dallas Howard) from beasts who want to kill her before she can escape on the back of a giant eagle. Sound ridiculous? It is, and Shyamalan’s blend of sight gags, mysticism and horror is never convincing or even remotely magical. At least the evenly spaced jolts prevent boredom from kicking in.